Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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