Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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