HIV tests are more positive than that guy
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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