we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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