Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
