Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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