I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Randomize
