It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
