Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
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