so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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