Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
