It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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