Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
