"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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