My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.