When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
