Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
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we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
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Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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