im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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