Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I deserve this hangover.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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