I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Randomize
