Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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