He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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