the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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