i think my mom watched the whole time
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
