We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
40s are totally the cure
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize