@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I woke up under a house in Key West
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
