You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
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