i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
