i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
home. puking in laundry basket.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
