i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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