I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
she looked like the before picture.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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