yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
