That's intense
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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