i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
