i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
