My brain says no but my pants say off.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
