North Korea, Best Korea!
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Just pee around me
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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