i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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