just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
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