Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
