Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.