Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
