Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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