He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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