..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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