i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
