I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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