Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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