Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
He has the fingertips of a God
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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