i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
