problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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